29 February 2012

Color

When everything is all grey shadow,
When even the blacks and the whites spin into the blurry grey.
I have found that it is not great trial or great gladness that threaten to destroy me.
It is the in between.
I go mad in the in between.
It's when nothing seems to matter.
But I can't let that happen.
Because it does matter!
Life must be lived in the moment, in thanks for each one.
It is color.
Streaks of crimson blood bringing the white in my life.
Washing the thousand new stains.
The deepest blues of the heavens hung with stars.
The green of the newly alive flowers.
Purple robes of a King.
Maybe this Lent.........
Maybe it's to remind us that here in the in between of life,
between the dust that we were formed from,
and the beginning of new life in the presence of the Master of the Universe,
we need to fast.
Because when you don't have something,
it becomes far more valuable.
And I think that when it is all grey,
the color becomes the most intense.
So I'm living my life in thanks for the color.
In thanks for that I don't have.
For what I can see,
and for that I can't.
In humble gratefulness to Him.
The Father.
The Son.
The Holy Spirit.
Amen.

Love:)

R

27 February 2012

Please be my strength- Gungor

I’ve tried to stand my ground
I’ve tried to understand
but I can’t seem to find my way
like water on the sand
or grasping at the wind
I keep on falling short

please be my strength
please be my strenth
I don’t have anymore
I don’t have anymore

I’m looking for a place
that I can plant my faith
one thing I know for sure
I cannot create it
I cannot sustain it
It’s Your love that’s keeping  me

please be my strength
please be my strenth
I don’t have anymore
I don’t have anymore

At my final breath
I hope that I can say
I’ve fought the good fight of faith
I pray your glory shines
through this doubting heart of mine
so my world would know that You

You are my strength
You are my strength
You and You alone
You and You alone
Keep bringin me back home

26 February 2012

My purpose remains

Your will above all else
My purpose remains

The art of losing myself
In bringing you praise

22 February 2012

Isaiah 53: 4,5

Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.


It's haunting, and lovely, and from one of the greatest pieces of music ever.

We Like Sheep

Surely he has borne our griefs
    and carried our sorrows;

yet we esteemed him stricken,
     smitten by God, and afflicted.

  But he was pierced for our transgressions;
    he was crushed for our iniquities;
upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace,
     and with his wounds we are healed.
  All we like sheep have gone astray;
   
 we have turned—every one—to his own way;
and the Lord has laid on him
    the iniquity of us all.

 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted,
     yet he opened not his mouth;
like a lamb that is led to the slaughter,
    and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent,
    so he opened not his mouth.
 By oppression and judgment he was taken away;
    and as for his generation, who considered
that he was cut off out of the land of the living,
    stricken for the transgression of my people?
 And they made his grave with the wicked
     and with a rich man in his death,
although he had done no violence,
    and there was no deceit in his mouth.
 Yet it was the will of the Lord to crush him;
    he has put him to grief;
when his soul makes an offering for guilt,
    he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days;
the will of the Lord shall prosper in his hand.
 Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied;
by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant,
     make many to be accounted righteous,
     and he shall bear their iniquities.
 Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many,
     and he shall divide the spoil with the strong
because he poured out his soul to death
    and was numbered with the transgressors;
yet he bore the sin of many,
    and makes intercession for the transgressors
(Isaiah 53: 4-12)

It's Ash Wednesday. We begin today the 40 days of remembrance.
For my sins God died.
I write that-
and it tears at me.
Oh, God, why?
Not because I was worthy-
all these filthy sins.
But for Love.
To make intercession for the transgressors.
the transgressors- me, chief.
This, I think is what  Lent is-
A time to see our darkest of sins in the bold light of extravagant grace.

Love:)

r

19 February 2012

The Love Experiment


Honestly, I never thought it would go this far.
It was the suggestion of a book, and I was intrigued.
I didn't know how much it would mess me up.
Simple words.......yeah, that's what I thought.
God, teach me to love like You do.For the last year I've prayed that.
Not every day,
just whenever I remembered.
It has messed me up.
I can't dislike people anymore.
Not to say some people don't annoy me.
But instead of not liking them,
all I see is their pain.
How broken they are.
I catch a glimpse of how filled with hurt they are.
It's not easy, to be completely honest.
It's a lot easier to hate people's guts.
Loving,
having your heart break,
wondering how to even glance the surface of the pain....
It's hard.
It isn't popular.
But it's how Jesus loves.
I don't have it all together.
He does.
He sees way deeper into the pain than I ever do.
He still loves.
How do you do that? In Him.
I'm not there yet.
But I'm working on it.
And it's changed me. Honestly, I never thought it would go this far.
It was the suggestion of a book, and I was intrigued.
I didn't know how much it would mess me up.
Simple words.......yeah, that's what I thought.
God, teach me to love like You do.For the last year I've prayed that.
Not every day,
just whenever I remembered.
It has messed me up.
I can't dislike people anymore.
Not to say some people don't annoy me.
But instead of not liking them,
all I see is their pain.
How broken they are.
I catch a glimpse of how filled with hurt they are.
It's not easy, to be completely honest.
It's a lot easier to hate people's guts.
Loving,
having your heart break,
wondering how to even glance the surface of the pain....
It's hard.
It isn't popular.
But it's how Jesus loves.
I don't have it all together.
He does.
He sees way deeper into the pain than I ever do.
He still loves.
How do you do that? In Him.
I'm not there yet.
But I'm working on it.
And it's changed me.
I dare you to try.
God, teach me to love like You do.Whenever you think of it.
I wrote the word Love on as piece of paper and stuck it to my ceiling as a reminder.
See what it does to you.
It can't hurt to try.

Love:)
R

18 February 2012

Stations on the road to freedom

Discipline

     If you would find freedom, learn above all to discipline your senses and your soul. Be not led hither and thither by your desires and your members. Keep your spirit and your body chaste, wholly subject to you, and obediently seeking the goal that is set before you.  None can learn the secret of freedom, save by discipline.


Action

     To do and dare--not what you would, but what is right. Never to hesitate over what is in your power, but boldly to grasp what lies before you. Not in the flight of fancy, but only in the deed there is freedom. Away with timidity and also reluctance! Out into the storm of event, sustained only by the commandment of God and your faith, and freedom will accept you with exultation.


Suffering

     O wondrous change! Those hands, once so strong and active, have now been bound. Helpless and forlorn, you see the end of your deed. Yet with a sigh of relief you resign your cause to a stronger hand, and are content to do so. For one brief moment you enjoyed the bliss of freedom, only to give it back to God, that he might perfect it in glory.


Death

     Come now, Queen of the feasts on the road to eternal freedom! O death, cast off the grievous chains and lay low the thick walls of our mortal body and our blinded soul, that at last we may behold what we have failed to see. O freedom, long have we sought thee in discipline and in action and in suffering. Dying we behold thee now, and see thee in the face of God.

-Dietrich Bonhoeffer
His final stop on the road to freedom came at the hands of the Nazis 23 days before the Allied liberation of Germany.

15 February 2012

We remember

 
And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.”
 In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.
(Luke 22:19-20)

The pastor says these words, holding high the bread, breaking it, pouring the wine. And then we are invited to take, to eat, to take part in the remembrance, but also to join in communion together.
 To unite as one body, taking the remembrance of flesh and blood, broken and spilled for our sins.
 To remember the act of grace that washed us clean.
 Christ, dwelling among us, filling all the empty spaces.
  And we sit, we pray silently, and then as a congregation.
  Our words, rising up to God on high. A fragrant incense of love and adoration.
   Blood spilled, body broken.
   We remember.
   I'm longing for it today.
  This is what fellowship is all about.
   This is Church.
   This is communion.
 

13 February 2012

Get back up

This is a short scene from Chariots of Fire.
    It is about Eric Liddell, a man who chose to honor God. He became an Olympic gold medalist, and then a missionary to China. Ultimately, he made the ultimate sacrifice for China and the people who he loved, and died in a Japanese internment camp.

07 February 2012

Sola gratia

I'm judgemental.
There. I said it.
I said a Christian curse word, with no bolts of lightning.
Haha, yeah........anyway,
I am.
I hate to admit it, but I can be.
And I've lied.
And back-stabbed.
And a billion other things.
"Little things," we call  them.
"small sins."
We wish.
Who are we kidding?
Certainly not God.
It's all the same to Him.
We are disgusted by embezzlers, by murderers.
Didn't Jesus say that if you hate your brother, it's the same as if you had murdered him?
All those other sins.....
Big ones, small.
I act like they're so horrible.
Unforgivable, even.
Hypocrite.
What makes it that I can be forgiven?
Blood spilled, body broken.
What makes it so that they can be forgiven?
Blood spilled, body broken.
Ohh.......
We all fall,
all have turned away.
But He forgives.
Me,
you,
them.
All.
Through Grace.
Forgiveness.
So grateful for that.
Even what we feel is unforgivable....
Blood spilled, body broken.
Grace.
Grace alone.
Sola gratia.

Love:)

R

03 February 2012

What does it take?

What does it take to bring you to your face in front of God?
Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power
   and the glory and the majesty and the splendor,
   for everything in heaven and earth is yours.
Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom;
   you are exalted as head over all.

(1 Chronicles 29:11)

02 February 2012

Psalm 55:15-19,22

As for me, I call to God,
   and the LORD saves me.
Evening, morning and noon
   I cry out in distress,
   and he hears my voice.
He rescues me unharmed
   from the battle waged against me,
   even though many oppose me.
God, who is enthroned from of old,
   who does not change. Cast your cares on the LORD
   and he will sustain you;
he will never let
   the righteous be shaken.